Part of

THE reader will bear in mind the spirited manner in which the preceding Number was brought to a close, by a chorus to Jack's song, executed by the whole strength, and heart too, of the company, and whose cadence was unexpectedly sustained by a burst of wild irregular music, in the shape of kicks against his door on the outside, from as many of a band of amateurs as could possibly command the instruments. this concerto may be supposed to have expressed a desire to get in, the remainder being a pure sacrifice to the Genius of Uproar. Even thus does a footman's knock, previous to his letting down the carriage-steps, bear in its motive a composite character, as the commencement is designed simply to indicate his master's presence and importance, the louder and longer, and the more magnificent portion, being as evidently altogether intended to indicate his

own.

"What the devil are you kicking up such a row about?" was the exclamation with which Jack and all of us greeted the inundation of newcomers which poured in.

"Oh! did you hear us? Well, we're glad of that—we thought you didn't."

The burden of this response was chiefly sustained by two aspiring youths, rejoicing (an old college phrase) in the names of Thomson and Nixon. Both of them ranked amongst the most inveterate cautionmen within the walls, and were much respected by Moriarty, with whom they were on a footing of the utmost intimacy. In fact, at an early stage of their acquaintance, I know that Thomson and Jack had wrung the knockers off each other's doors reciprocally. After many vain attempts to obtain a degree, Thomson retired in disgust to a small hereditary property in the county of Westmeath, and settling into a much-respected judge of a horse, developed a genius for handicapping, which his friends, it would appear, had pre

viously mistaken as directed to the abstract sciences, and became henceforth an object of admiration and circumspection to all the sporting gentry of the neighbourhood. Of Nixon, I cannot say that my information reaches beyond the fact of his having been the son of old Nixon, I suppose, whoever he was, and with that curious point the reader must be content.

"Come, Jack, on with your worst coat, if worse you have than that which is on you. We're all for Crow Street Theatre; so up with you, every mother's son of you!"

"Why, what's the fun to-night?" "Fun, is it? Why, man alive, isn't L, the amateur barrister, to play Macbeth, and won't it take us all to laugh at it to do it any justice ?"

The resolution of adjourning our meeting to Crow Street on the instant, if not a great deal sooner, was carried by acclamation, without the formality of its being put from the chair. This ceremony, moreover, would not have been indeed very practicable now, inasmuch as the regular chairman, Jack, had vacated his office the moment the proposal was announced, and, clearing the table at a bound, was already half-way down-stairs. There could not, in fact, have been any idea more opportunely broached. College parties being in their very essence of the bachelor order, we had not the means of varying the evening's amusements by ascending, as is usual, to the drawing-room, to rouse, like air let in on sleeping lamps, from their intentional torpor its inmates, especially the junior part, and who, although the piano is opened (that is abandoned for the present to the little girls), the music arranged, and the lights all trimmed, have not the slightest notion of throwing their pearls before the old dowagers in turbans, who, deeply imbedded in sofas, are engaged with their faces half turned round, talking to each other, in a drowsy earnestness, about

nothing. Nor was the usual substitute which the city had provided, and which consisted in the recreation of pulling watchmen about, available, as the hour for their "going on duty." as it was facetiously called (if that e referred to the idea suggested by the etymology, but which was, of course, obsolete in practice), had not yet arrived. Accordingly, we all sallied down-stairs, and mustered our forces, now amounting to something more than a hundred, at the public door of the building, as each compartment of chambers enjoying a common stair is technically denominated. Of this body, Moriarty, as a just tribute to his merits, was unanimously elected chief, and by his movements those of the party, in general, were to be regulated. A considerable proportion of our numbers comprised those whose names were on the county lists, wherein are enrolled all whose practice it is to attend merely the term examinations, as distinguished from the residents within the walls of the university. To several of these, their temporary chief was personally unknown, although none were strangers to his name and peculiar virtues, the glory whereof was spread among all college men almost through the whole island; but any difficulty on this head was speedily obviated by introducing themselves, as they did, in the easiest manner possible to Mr. Moriarty, calling him Jack on the instant. The order of march included a disposition of our party into files of four each, with strict injunctions to prevent a separation of forces, to take close order, while our commander-in-chief himself assumed such an advanced position as would enable him to move about freely, vapouring and raging in front like the old heroes in Homer. The word being given, off we set at a swinging trot, all talking at once, each one being obliged to act as his own listener, silence, where there were such anticipations of fun, being physically impossible. Just as we wheeled round into the long vaulted arch, which issues in the gateway, M'Allister, the head-porter, met us, and forthwith got into a high official state of agitation, his pale aged face quivering in every muscle, and his withered hands spread out to intercept our progress.

The clown's attempt to stop the Atlantic with a pitchfork is considered a good illustration of an useless effort; and Mr. M'Allister's attempt to stop us was one, too, not to be despised in its way.

"God bless me, gentlemen, what is this-what is this?"

"An expedition of a purely literary nature, Mr. M'Allister; isn't it, boys?" replied our Jack, with a mild seriousness of manner. "We're going to the theatre, Mr. M'Allister, solely with a view to improve our pronunciation by the best stage standards. Aren't we, boys?" said Jack, appealing to us confidently.

"Nothing else, we assure you; take our words for it, Mr. M'Allister," we all answered in one earnest chorus.

"Oh! but, gentlemen, me and the provost," said the official.

"Trust to our discretion, Mr. M'Allister," replied Jack; "you and the provost may go to sleep on that point."

"Our discretion, Mr. M'Allister," chorus again.

'Well, Mr. Moriarty, I do trust you, and am sure you will not make more noise than you well can."

"Never fear, Mr. M'Allister, we'll not make more than our medical attendants' certificates will warrant."

This parley over, although it did not remove altogether an anxious shade from the countenance of the good-hearted officer, who habitually Looked upon the sons of Alma Mater as all his own, in sooth; for those which Nature had given him she had taken away again, and would not let him keep them, and so the poor man supplied the void as well as he could with us. He preceded us to the gate, evidently prepared to rate soundly whoever should impede us, as, however anxious he might be to stop us himself, he was not the man to allow any one else to do so. As we defiled through the narrow gateway --a comparatively small aperture in the huge folding-doors, and for which there is made a solemn provision in the original statutes, as a means of securing privacy-we could hear the old man issuing strict injunctions to the inferior porters to keep a lookout after those children (our infantine years averaged about eighteen), while he himself continued to pursue us with his eye for a long space.

"Who has e'er had the luck to see"not Donnybrook fair, although that, too, is the guerdon of a glorious lot (Jack and I will be there anon-shall we not, Jack?—so shall the reader, too, if he behaves himself, and can muster twopence to pay the car), but Trinity College, Dublin, will remember the convex segment of iron railing, which separates the front of the building from the street. Α small vacant space at each extremity is garnished by a range of applestalls, where the ancient ladies who smoke and smile from behind them, continue to sustain with their sweet voices during the day a concert piece of" Ten a pennyten sweet apples

a penny!" and hold a feast of paper lanterns until a late hour of the night. This portion of ground appertaining to the college forms a subject of university patronage, and which is understood to be exercised by the porters, to whom, on occasion of a vacant stall, memorials, with the proper documents, are to be addressed. In the centre of the railing there is an iron gate; and past it flows perpetually, as Johnson says of the Strand, the fullest torrent of a Dublin population. At this point may be seen the few private carriages of which the Irish metropolis can still boast, whose proprietors, to do justice to their system of domestic compensation, dine upon herrings; as people, indeed, must do, who will insist upon riding in carriages, (oh, sweet Dublin pride for ever!) long after the natural period of walking barefooted has, in the stages of fortune, reached them. Here, too, pass whole squadrons of dandies with whips and spurs, from whence, we may remark by the way, to conclude their possession of a horse would be rather rash logic. Nowhere through the whole city are there more old women run over than at the two crossings at each extremity of the railing, an arrangement attended with peculiar advantages. I do not allude so much to those resulting from so many old women being put out of the way, for these are obvious, -as to the relief from his monotonous circuit as such an exciting spectacle must necessarily afford to the officer of the Bank guard, who, sick of his lonely room, has been often known to rush madly out to see if he can see any VOL. XXVII. NO. CLVIII.

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On

thing. Nor would I exclude from the consideration of final causes the gleam of happiness hence derived on the poor galley-slaves of grinders in the front buildings, who are sure to start up at the smallest ghost of a scream, and run to the window. Bursting, then, through the tide which streamed across the aperture, and shouldering the crowd aside — a process which disclosed a pig or so—— (I never saw in my time a respectable crowd in Ireland that had not one pig, at least, in the centre; the exact reason of which is, that it had no reason at all for being there. This is just the way with pigs; and it's just the same way, they say, with women) — we proceeded straight up the middle of the street. The Bank sentries became quite animated at the spectacle, and ordered arms, to enjoy it the better. reaching the statue of King William III. in the centre of College Green, we saluted the old hero of the Boyne with a vociferous cheer, piquing ourselves, as we all justly did, on being excellent Protestants, however indifferent we might be as Christians. Our object now was, as a hurried glance shewed the direct entrance to the pit-door to be already blockaded by an immense crowd, to reach it by a circuitous route through Crow Street, into which also opened the door that gave access to the boxes, and which appeared likely, as being less known, to present fewer impediments. this, however, we were disappointed, as it was in rather a more vigorous state of siege than the more open path. The fact was, that every person, as well as ourselves, had knowingly made for this secret point of approach, and found his neighbour there before him, just as knowingly as himself. Even thus did the managers of the Bank of Ireland once issue a series of notes, in which private marks of recognition were inserted, ingeniously enough too, except that they were so palpable that every body knew them, forgers and all. I do not, in truth, recollect many occasions which drew an equally large number of people to the theatre with the present. Mr. L, whose name had operated as a charm to empty Moriarty's chambers in a twinkling, was an equally power

M

In

ful source of attraction to the population in general. He had repeatedly appeared-for the purposes of charity however, as being a gentleman in independent circumstances on the Dublin boards, and with such a grotesque effect as never failed to excite the highest amusement. His attitudes were so extravagant-his intonations so violent his gestures marked by such absurd vehemencebut, above all, his interpolations were so extraordinary, not simply of a few lines, but of whole scenes composed by himself on the spur of the moment, even to the extent, when carried away by the applause of the audience, of singing any song they required in the very midst of some high tragic crisis, and which from its utter irrelevancy made the contrast so irresistibly ludicrous, that the spectators were kept in roars of laughter, the more impetuous, from the apparent insensibility of their object to their direction, and who, poor man! continued to grunt out his notes all the more vigorously. The very actors on the stage lost all command of face, and even the head fiddler in the orchestra would screw down the corners of his mouth into as much of a smile as any head fiddler can be expected to indulge in who has any notion of what a head fiddler really is, and of his duty in shewing a model of dignity to all under fiddlers. Many of my Dublin readers will recollect the gentleman of whom I am treating, nor surely without some feeling of gratitude, if they can share in the sensation of Johnson, when excited by the memory of Garrick-his Davy Garrick-towards one who, in his own peculiar way, so "gladdened life and added to the public stock of harmless amusement."

The reader will not have forgotten that the evening on which Jack Moriarty led on his valiant band beyond the defiles of the college gates belonged to a day far on in June. The exact period of this part of my story might probably be about halfpast six o'clock. Of course there was the full light of day to shew us a sea of heads, which fluctuated to and fro in the narrow chops of Crow Street. So closely was the living mass wedged together, that a pin let drop from an upper window could not possibly have insinuated its

way

to the ground. The line extended even into Dame Street; and when increased by the accession of our party, was continued to the kerbstone on the farther side. As we, therefore, constituted the extreme portion of the crowd, and the multitude in advance was quite sufficient of itself to fill the pit to suffocation, it was plain that unless we could by some manœuvre break up the mass and then advance through the dissolved elements, we might abandon at once all hopes of seeing L-for that night in his professional capacity.

"There's nothing for it that I can see," said Jack, after surveying the crowd on tip-toe for a few moments, and then taking private counsel with himself for as many more, "unless we institute a box royal-a strong measure, certainly; it can't, however, be helped, that's certain; so let us institute it without any further trouble."

Now a Box Royal is a curious enough sort of an exercise. It is a form of war of a nature considerably peculiar, involving, as it does, the belligerent parties in a state of indiscriminate hostility, where each man hits his neighbour of the moment, and only of a moment, as the general agitation of the crowd precludes a longer period of propinquity, and, of course, never hits the same opponent twice. Under these circumstances, all that a reasonable person can do when he receives a blow is to soothe his sorrows by waging war against man abstract, and hit the very first he can. Thus, moreover, a sense of monotony resulting from one's exertions being limited to a single object is happily enough obviated, and to the general spectator a pleasing variety is diffused over the scene. So then, upon the whole, we may conclude, that independent of the specific advantages proposed by my friend Jack as accruing therefrom, a box royal is one of those acts of a community which brings, in a tolerable degree, its own reward.

Immediately before Moriarty there stood-either on his own fect or those of some one's else, for the crowd apparently lifted him up-a sallowfaced fat little man, having manifestly, however, an immense soul, as little men are apt to have, and who, instead of making the best of his embarrassed circumstances, by quietly

inhaling and expiring as much of the atmosphere as coolly as he could catch it, chose to vent it out in exclamations of impatience, apparently deluded with the idea that the doorkeepers could hear him; carrying on the delusion, moreover, even to the extent of supposing that, if they did hear him, they would attend to him. This worthy little gentleman did Jack select as a fit subject for operations.

"I say, this delay is scandalousscandalous !"

"I say so too, sir," said our excellent friend, wishing by his civility to encourage the little man's conversation, and lifting his hand in a very suspicious manner over the little man's hat.

"It is, sir, just as you say," said the little man, endeavouring to turn round to catch a glance of his courteous respondent's face, but which that courteous respondent prevented by a mild interposition of his elbow -accidentally, of course-just so.

"This must be represented to the manager," continued the little man, speaking earnestly to Moriarty's elbow.

"Possibly," said Jack, having by this time disengaged both his hands, and laid them softly on the crown of the little man's hat, "a letter in the Carrick's post with your name would tickle up these gentry's notions."

"Do you think so-eh? A good suggestion, and if

At this instant the treacherous Jack applied 'his whole force, and down over eyes and nose went the self-important's hat. This was enough. As much of the face as was visible, amounting only to the lips and chin, was pervaded with a quivering motion, and which testified how happy Jack's efforts had been in getting him into a passion. The ultimate results on which he had speculated were justified in the event, and a glorious row was forthwith on foot. Back did the extinguished one draw his clenched fist, and in the act struck the person close behind, who, exciting himself in a similar manner to revenge the injury, propagated the impulse backwards, while a corresponding agitation in an onward quarter was communicated by the direct blow. I wish to speak with all respect of that class of labours of scientific

men which have latterly been directed to the determination of the swiftest modes of communication. The French Institute are worthy of all praise, for the series of signals which they are about to attach to the national telegraphs. The experi

ments of Professor Wheatstone on magnetic wires, verified in many of our railways, can never be mentioned without honour. But if you would wish to see how far untutored nature will go, you ought to witness the spreading of a decent, sensible Irish row. Scarcely had Jack taken his hands off the hat, whose precipitate descent was the original source of the commotion, when the whole air became literally one waving forest of fists. The screaming of the women, the shrill shrieks of the children, who had been prudently brought there by their parents, supposing-the only supposition the case could really admit of - that they had been brought there with a view to their being crushed into atoms, the professionally haggard faces of the thousand tailors, who dignify, as is well known, that locality with their presence, and who delighted to enjoy the stirring spectacle, leant, with skeins of thread round their necks and balls of yellow wax dangling from their waistcoat buttons, more than half-way out of the garret windows, apparently indifferent, in their zeal for useful knowledge, whether they tumbled out wholly or not-all continued to give a most thrilling interest to the scene. Surge after surge of clenched hands rose and fell, met and clashed, rose and fell again. Forward into the narrow aperture would dash a torrent of combatants, and which was in turn repelled with equal fury, and thrown back into the wider thoroughfare of Dawe Street. Amid the confusion, I was completely separated from my party, and could only catch a hasty glimpse of the primitive agitator Moriarty, and who, on such occasions, seemed notoriously at his ease, distributing a blow here and another there, yet so as in no way to distress himself, getting forward, and not fighting, being evidently his object. By this time I became conscious of being carried strongly forward, even amid the conflicting agitations which pre