The Rights of Woman merit some attention."

In the preceding chapter I endeavored to show that nature, revelation, and the laws and customs of men, point to the husband as the head of the family circle; and that, as such, there are certain prerogatives solely invested in him, and also a cer tain amount of authority which he can properly exercise. The subject now before us relates to the manner in which this power should be used, and the extent to which it shall be carried.

The origin of the husband's authority affords one of the plainest indications of the manner in which he should exercise it, in respect to the wife We have seen that marriage is a covenant, entered into by both parties, for mutual benefit and happiness; and that each made a certain concession of privileges, for the general benefit of both. It is from this concession, made for this purpose, that whatever prerogative or authority the husband possesses over the wife, is derived. Hence he is not clothed with any power to exercise exclusively

for his own individual good—or for the purpose of enabling him to gratify a love of rule and authori ty-or to tyrannize over his companion-or to carry into execution his selfish will and pleasure, without respect to the welfare of those who are expected to submit to his dictation—or in any way to pamper or please self, alone. The wife, in uniting her destiny with his, and in surrendering certain rights which she before possessed, had no design to grant him any such power as this, or to place herself so entirely at his disposal; and therefore he is not endowed with this kind or degree of authority. But in all those cases connected with the welfare of the family, where it is ne cessary for the husband to display his authority for the good of those over whom it is swayed, he is justified, by the circumstances in which he is placed, in claiming and exercising this prerogative. It was to be used for this purpose, and this purpose only, that any power or authority is invested exclusively in him. The mutual compact by which the husband is placed at the head of the family, gives him no authority to abuse his wife, no power to contradict or thwart her desires unnecessarily, or imperiously to command her obedience to his word, except, perhaps, in some few very extreme cases. And whenever he attempts thus to pervert his prerogative, he violates the compact by which he has been clothed with them, and proceeds upon an assumption of authority which he does not possess. The husband "should remember that the rule

which renders him the natural head of the family, does not suppose any inferiority in the wife, any more than the law which makes one man a magistrate and another his executive officer, supposes one to be an abler or better man than the other. It is necessary that the power should be placed somewhere; but it does not follow that the depositary of this power should be elated with its possession, and exercise it with capricious or offensive coercion."

Although ultimate authority is vested in the husband, yet it should be his desire, his study, in all his conduct, to keep this circumstance from view as much as possible. Instead of constantly asserting his authority, and seeking opportunities to exhibit it, he should endeavor to act towards his wife, so far as practicable, as though he had no power superior to her own. He should exercise rule in a manner so gentle, so mild, so unseen, that those who are swayed by it, shall be unconscious of its existence. Delicacy, propriety, love for his companion, desire for domestic tranquillity and peace, all urge him to pursue this

course.

There are two methods in which the husband can make known his will-the one is in the form of a command-the other in that of a request. In the great majority of cases, the latter course is altogether the most successful manner of securing compliance. There is in human nature a spirit of independence, which rises in opposition to a stern,

imperious command, from a fellow-mortal, even though he who issues the command may be an object of the deepest affection. This disposition is visibly exhibited in childhood, and it "grows with our growth, and strengthens with our strength." As a general rule, mankind are much more easily won than coerced-more readily attracted than driven. Hence, as a mere matter of policy, without respect to the feelings of others, the husband who invites or requests compliance with his wishes, is much wiser than he who commands. And who cannot perceive the different influences which these two courses must produce upon the common enjoyment and peace of the domestic circle? Where despotic command is exercised, confusion, disobedience, and rebellion most generally prevail; for fear cannot produce so perfect an obedience from a rational being as love. But in the family where authority is robed in the pleasant and winning garments of kindness and affection, a willing obedience is yielded, and peace and harmony abound, as its legitimate fruits.

The cases where it is necessary for the husband to issue an absolute command to the wife, are very rare indeed. When there is a difference of opinion between husband and wife, upon an important subject connected with the welfare of the family, there should be a free and unrestrained interchange of views and feelings, without acrimony, or bitterness, or harshness, from either party. It is a misfortune under which many people labor, that they

cannot have their opinions questioned, or enter upon even a brief discussion, without soon losing temper, and allowing anger to overcome discretion and reason. This is one prolific source of those family broils which sometimes cause matrimony to assume an aspect so unpleasant. But this excitability should be strictly guarded against; it is one of the indications of an ignorant and shallow mind. Under the circumstances to which I have alluded, each party should carefully clothe their opinions in the dress of friendly advice, and be cautious not to utter anything to disparage one another, or to irritate to anger. The husband should be as ready to receive the wife's advice, as to impart his own. And he should give her opinions all the weight, and allow them to have all the influence in making up his judgment, that their merits deserve. If the wife advances the better reason-if she clearly demonstrates the propriety and correctness of her views-the husband should allow no emotions of false pride, no senseless notions about its being derogatory to submit to the judgment of a woman, to prevent him from acknowledging the correctness of her opinions, and acting accordingly. It is an attribute of a generous and noble mind, to be open to conviction, and to be willing to receive truth from any source whatever—while it is an unfailing indication of weakness and littleness, to cavil about the source whence a truth may proceed, and to reject it simply because it was uttered by some person whom they looked upon as