CHAPTER VII.

OF CONDUCT TOWARDS RELATIONS ACQUIRED BY MARRIAGE.

You have now, gentle lady, got among a new set of relatives-your relations-in-law; and a fresh field of duty is opened to you. There is an old observation, that a mother and her daughters-in-law are natural enemies; and, in truth, I must say there is too much reason for the remark. But in this disunion, there are generally, indeed almost always, faults on both sides. And why is this? why need any fault proceed from you? Why not imitate a character so beautifully drawn from Scripture-the warm-hearted and interesting Ruth? She loved her departed husband, and because she loved him his mother was dear to her. Friends, country, kindred-all were given up for the mother of him she loved. What a sweet picture of tenderness and sensibility!

I

confess I never read the story, without feeling strongly impressed and interested by it; and, in imagination, I see the beautiful Moabitess saying to her mother-in-law,

Nought but death shall part thee and me." If you love your husband, gentle lady, surely you must love the authors of his being, surely you must love the sisters of his youth!

And beside all this, listen for a moment to nature and reason. Your relations-in-law have lost their son and their brother; in truth, gentle lady, they have lost him; for when once a man is married, though he may repel the charge with warmth, and even with sincerity, adieu to the home and the scenes of his youth! adieu to the father who gave him life!-to the mother who nursed him in her bosom!-to the sisters who loved him in the fondest corner of their hearts! New objects, new connexions, new pursuits, have rivalled and "rent those ancient loves asunder;" and his wife, and very frequently her relatives, now step in, and draw away his love and his attention from all that had hitherto engrossed him. Is it any wonder, then, that relations-in-law should look with a degree of jealousy on the woman who has

thus alienated those affections and attentions which for so many years they were in the exclusive possession of?-A wife perhaps will cry out, and say, "Am I to blame for all this?-am I in any degree in fault? Pity, indeed, my husband did not keep himself single to dangle after his mother and sisters! Pray, is not a man to leave father and mother, and cleave to his wife?" Hush, gentle lady, hush! Bear with me for a moment. I mean not to contradict you; I mean not to blame you; nay, I do not even mean to say your husband should have done any thing but exactly what he did do; viz. marry you. All I ask, is, an effort to make yourself an exception to the coldness, the satire, the ill-nature, which too generally characterises a daughter-in-law or sister-in-law. All I ask is, (and I am sure a compliance is not difficult,) that you will, by kindness and affection, give your husband's family reason to rejoice in the day that he first introduced you among them.

And pray, gentle lady, let your manner to your sisters-in-law be particularly kind and considerate. You are made a happy wife at their expense, at their loss-the loss of a beloved brother. Enter into their feel

ings, endeavour to gain their confidence; your matronly experience qualifies you to be their adviser as well as friend. Do all you can to make them appear to advantage, and to forward their advancement through life. As a married woman, much lies in your power. Should there be a favourite swain, approved of by father, mother, and prudence on all sides, remember your own feelings on a similar occasion, and take every opportunity to promote the union. Married women are sometimes extremely apt to forget girlish pursuits, hopes, and wishes, and to speak satirically of the very manner which perhaps before marriage they had themselves been remarkable for. Avoid such inconsistency, and give your sisters-in-law reason to say, “No: we have not lost our brother by his marriage-far from it; we have gained a sweet sister and friend!"

K

CHAPTER VIII.

PERSONAL AND RELATIVE CONFIDENCE.

WHILE the most unreserved and perfect personal confidence should characterise the intercourse of married people, in all that relates to themselves, and each should strenuously endeavour to act upon the advice—

"Let no one have thy confidence, O wife, saving thine husband, Have not a friend more intimate, O husband, than thy wife;"

yet there are some relative duties binding on men in their intercourse with society, that render it honourable for a man to preserve inviolable secrecy, and demand from a wife a generous and respectful acquiescence in his silence. Woman also, when called out from domestic life to professional responsibilities, incurs a similar obligation; though this is so much more rarely her destiny that rules for the regulation of her conduct therein are not requisite.