20

Foreword

because no work bearing such a title as this one can, altogether, ignore them.

This programme is sufficiently tremendous, and if I have not succeeded in fulfilling it in this initial edition I ask for the latitude usually accorded the pioneer, feeling confident that

"My object, all sublime,

I shall achieve in time:"

which is, perhaps, a dangerous quotation to employ in view of the line which follows it; but I will risk the retort.

In a flattering review of my previous work, "The Complete Limerick Book," a Scottish literary critic regretted that I had a frivolous mind. This is a serious charge to bring against a writer of Nonsense, and I can only assure my Caledonian friend that in this present work I have, again, done my best to deserve it.

As worthy Doctor Young so aptly expressed it, some two hundred and fifty years ago in his "Night Thoughts":

"Who does the best his circumstance allows,

Does well, acts nobly; angels could no more."

This is a very comforting reflection for assassins and authors, as well as angels, and if you do not agree with me, gentle reader, well then you can jolly well disagree and that's that!

21 CHRISTCHURCH ROAD,

HAMPSTEAD, LONDON.

October, 1925.

LANGFORD REED.

BOOK OF NONSENSE VERSE

The Campaign of the Horses:

Let us sing the mighty deeds of our famous noble steeds.
They deserve a celebration for their service heretofore.
Charges and attacks, exploits enacted in the days of yore:
These, however, strike me less, as having been performed ashore.
But the wonder was to see them, when they fairly went aboard,
With canteens and bread and onions, victualled and completely
stored.

Then they fixed and dipped their oars beginning all to shout and neigh,

Just the same as human creatures, "Pull away, boys! Pull away!"

"Bear a hand there, Roan and Sorrel! Have a care there, Black and Bay!"

'From J. Hookham Frere's translation of "The Knights." In its original Greek form it is probably the oldest Nonsense Poem known, for the comedy in which it appears was first produced in 426 B.C. The "poetic Crabbe" (originally "Crab") is a slighting reference to the Greek tragic poet, Carkinus, and, as translated, to the English poet, Crabbe, also. It seems probable that this poem may have suggested to Swift the idea for the Third Voyage of Gulliver.

22

Book of Nonsense Verse

Then they leapt ashore at Corinth; and the lustier younger

sort

Strolled about to pick up litter, for their solace and disport: And devoured the crabs of Corinth, as a substitute for clover. So that a poetic Crabbe, exclaimed in anguish, "All is over! What awaits us, mighty Neptune, if we cannot hope to keep From pursuit and persecution in the land or on the deep."

ARISTOPHANES.

Sir Hudibras' Accomplishments

(From "Hudibras," 1663)

He was in logic a great critic,
Profoundly skilled in analytic,
He could distinguish and divide

A hair 'twixt south and south-west side;
On either which he would dispute,
Compute, change hands, and still compute.
He'd undertake to prove by force
Of argument a man's no horse;
He'd prove a buzzard is no fowl,
And that a lord may be an owl,

A.M.B

A calf an alderman, a goose a justice,
And rooks committee men and trustees;

24

Book of Nonsense Verse

He'd run in debt by disputation
And pay with ratiocination,
And this by syllogism true

In mood and figure he would do.

SAMUEL BUTLER.