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HILE our thoughts are turned to the Founders of the Nation, picturing them as men and imagining the lives they led, it is interesting to consider the sort of theatrical entertainments they enjoyed, nearly a century and a half ago, and compare these old-time productions with the shows of today.

By Lawton Mackall

The 9 Show Shop

President Washington, it seems. was as indefatigable a playgoer as President Wilson. He was a constant patron of the old John Street Theater in New York, and when the seat of Government was moved to Philadelphia, many atrical enterprises followed in his wake. "The President," says a historian, "frequently occupied the east stage-box. Over the front of the box was the United States coat of arms, and the interior was gracefully festooned with red drapery. . . . Washington's reception at the theater was always exceedingly formal and ceremonious. A soldier was generally posted at each stage-door; four soldiers were placed in the gallery; a military guard attended. Wignell (the director), in a full suit of black, with his hair elaborately powdered in the fashion of the times, and holding two wax candles in silver candlesticks, was accustomed to receive the President at the box door and conduct Washington and his party to their seats. Even the newspapers began to take notice of the President's visits to the theater."

In one respect, however, the Father of His Country was at a disadvantage as compared with our present Chief Magistrate: vaudeville had not been invented. An idea of the sort of offerings that were available at that time may be gained from a recently issued volume entitled "Repre

sentative Plays by American Dram

atists, 1765-1819," edited by
Montrose J. Moses (E. P. Dutton
& Co.)-truly a collection of
curiosities, as quaintly early-
American as a Stiegel decanter
or a Bennington Toby-jug.

It is instructive to note
the type of woman the audi-
ences of that day delighted in.
She was hardly a Broadway
lady. The sight of the dam-
sels on the right-hand page
would have thrown her into
a faint. Even our revered fore-
fathers, who flinched not in the
face of red-coated tyrants, would
have been severely discombobolated;
for the champions of liberty did dote
on propriety!

As an indication of the sort of girl that appealed to them let us take Maria,

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heroine of "The Contrast," a highly popular comedy of the period. Maria is the personification of sentimental timidity and helplessness. In those days they called it female delicacy. "Formed of the more delicate materials of nature," she murmurs, in one of her sighing soliloquies, "endowed only with the softer passions, incapable,'from our ignorance of the world, to guard against the wiles of mankind, our security for happiness often depends upon men's generosity and courage." And again: "Reputation is the life of woman; yet courage to protect it is masculine and disgusting; and the only safe asylum a woman of delicacy can find is in the arms of a man of honor." We could think of a more appropriate asylum for her, but it's probably too late now.

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To complete her perfection, she is a model daughter an obsolete model. "Heaven knows! with what reluctance I should oppose the will of a parent, or set an example of filial disobedience; at a parent's command I could wed awkwardness and deformity."

Knowing these reassuring facts about her, we can. be confident that when she falls in love she will act decorously. Col. Manly, her estimable admirer, tries her with: "I hope you will excuse my speaking on so important a subject so abruptly; but, the moment I entered the room, you struck me as the lady whom I had long loved in imagination and never hoped to see!" Will she, distraught creature, follow the dictates of her heart? Not Maria! She's not taking cardiac dictation this morning. 'Indeed, sir," she replies, "I've been led to hear more upon this subject than I ought."

Photo by Campbell

Edith Day, the popular avia-
tion instigator of "Going Up."

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But the Colonel is loath to be outdelicacied. "Permit me only to be near you, and by a thousand tender assiduities to endeavor to excite a grateful return." But his gallant efforts are of no avail. With rare female refinement she intimates that because of Papa there can be nothing doing. And so he bids her farewell (pro tem) with: "We are both unhappy; but it is your duty to obey your parent-mine to obey my honor. Let us, therefore, both follow the path of rectitude; and of this we may be assured, that if we are not happy, we shall, at least, deserve to be so." A consoling thought, that.

Such was the type of girl that the Tired Early Patriot went to the theater to see. After the bleakness of Valley Forge she probably seemed entertaining.

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66

A Friendly Call

By MORRIS WADE

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ES, it's me, Sister Ellsby," said the tall, gaunt, resolute looking lady of somewhat advanced years when making her first call at the parsonage in which the new minister had been established but two weeks. "I reckon you do have some trouble in remembering so many new faces. The wife of our last paster was great at remembering both names and faces. She never forgot a person once she had seen 'em. She had lots of good traits that are going to make us miss her a lot. Thanks. I will come in and set down. I ain't but a few minutes to stay but I thought-my! look at that dab of dirt on the new wallpaper in this hall! Seems like our Ladies' Aid hardly gets the parsonage. fixed up until it needs new paint or paper. I ain't had a foot o' new paper in my house in ten years. Stale bread crumbs might take that spot off if it ain't grease, and I don't see why there should be grease spots in a front hall. You well?"

"Quite well, thank you, Sister Ellsby."

"I didn't see you out at the missionary meeting las' night and I took it you must be sick or you'd of been there. If the paster's wife don't take an int'rest in missions I don't see how she can expect the other wimmen of the church to. It would save this carpet a good deal if you laid strips of old carpet around. Our Ladies' Aid had to get the money to lay the carpets here in the parsonage. It ain't many ministers gets parsonages with carpets all laid in three o' the rooms. I see you got these here portyairs over the door between the parlor here and the settingroom. Huh! I never could see the sense o' hangin' curtains over doorways. Looks as if there was something to hide. Our last paster's wife didn't have a portyair in the whole parsonage. She was a mighty nice sensible woman. If we'd liked him much as we did her we would of kep' him. Is your husband a real well man?"

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Yankee Machine Gunner (who has lost his way but anxious to make the most of a trying situation)-Pardon me, but is this the way to Berlin?

it seems to me he's some holler-chested. Does he drink coffee ev'ry morning? He does? That prob'ly helps to explain it. There's so many good substitutes for coffee I think he better stop coffee and try some of them. You tell him to try Grain-O. With nice rich cream it's about as good as coffee. You take only a quart of milk a day? Well, none of us has just what we want. You ought to put a carpet on them front stairs. We've just had 'em painted. Look at that rent in that window shade! And the shades in this room all new not three years ago! I don't think that rent was there when the last paster's fam❜ly moved out. The grass in the front yard looks as if you'd allowed your children to tromp it down a good deal. We had fresh seed sowed in it last spring and it won't grow if it is tromped down. Seems to me that picture you've got hung above the mantel would look better between the two front windows. Ain't your youngest child awfully pullin'. You don't let him eat candy, do you? Our last paster's wife allowed her children to eat so much candy we had to speak to her about it. She was known to buy a whole pound at one time and to pay nineteen cents for it. And him asking for a raise in his sal'ry. And she used nearly three pounds o' butter a week and only five in the fam'ly. It doesn't look well for a paster's fam❜ly to set an example in high living. Well, I guess I'll run along. I just run in for a little friendly call andphew! What's that nice smell? It's just a spice cake you are baking? Purty expensive kind of cake ain't it? If my husband had only six hundred a year it's mighty few spice cakes I would make. Well, I got to run along. Any time you'd like to ask me anything feel free to do so. I been her twenty-five years and our paster's wives know that I'm always ready to advise. If you'd keep the shades drawn closer it'd save the carpet from fading. I must run along. Good-bye."

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An Unpromising Outlook

"I DON'T presizely know how to get shet of my brother-in-law, who came with his family about two months ago to make us a nice long visit," confessed the gaunt Missourian. "He has the asthmy too bad to work but not bad enough to keep him from differing with me on politics, religion, weather signs, the way to end the war, and most everything else that I happen to mention. His wife has queer spells and distinguished ancestors and a very superior manner. All their five children except the third one, counting from either end, have musical or elocutionary or movie talent, or something equally as repulsive. The exception that I have indicated has nothing the matter with him except that he steals everything he can lay his hands on.

"You see, wife and me, we have lived so long in the old home that we are sorter attached to it, and kinda hate to burn the house down, except as a last resort."

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Tent and Deck

Wheezes Military and Naval

JUDGE pays $1 each for original jokes sent by soldiers and sailors and accepted
for publication, and each week $5 is awarded for the best original joke received

The Hard-Boiled Sergeant

By SERGT. GEORGE H. HODGE, A. S. S. C., U. S. 4.

TWENTY years in the Army, an Enlisted Man,

am I,

Across my breast the colors rest where I've seen Old

Glory fly.

On hand at the Boxer Party, and when Aguinaldo

gave in,

And I've served in every Department; in Cuba and
Tien Tsin.

Late years it's been Detached Service, kind of a cinch
for a change;

But today is findin' me drillin' and marchin' the

rookies to Range.

My bunch is somewhat different from the bunch what
used to be,

When there was Billy Hare, from God knows where,
an' Sergeant Shay, an' me.

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Everything Big

Drawn by C. J. Dow, U. S. N.

They sure have some big clotheslines on these
battleships!"

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PVT. JACK KELLY, Cantonment Hdqrs. Detachment, Camp Upton, N. Y.
"How the folks back home think he looks, and as he is."

An Apprehensive Mother
By PVT. J. BLANDING HAMAN, Editor Trench and Camp, Fort Ogle-
thorpe, Ga.

A "rookie" reached Fort Oglethorpe, Ga., to
be inducted into the army. Among the first
things he received was "a shot in the arm." In
writing home that night he spoke of his inocula-
tion in that way and a few days later his company
commander got the following telegram from his
mother:

"Wire me immediately if George's shot in the
arm is serious."

Why Not?

PAUL HANSON
US.TRANSPORT AMERICA

Drawn by PAUL HANSON, U. S. Transport "America."
"See how green the water is! We're off the Irish
coast now."

A Nice Distinction

By JACK TAWER, H. A. 1, Naval Hospital, Annapolis, Md.
The other night a sentry stopped a colored
mess attendant and said:

"Halt! Who goes there?"
The colored person replied:

"I'se not goin'. I'se comin' back."

The Voice of Their Uncle

Sam

By PRIVATE O. J. BERINGER, U. S. Marine
Corps

A green batch of recruits who
had just come into camp the
preceding night, were startled
from their sound slumbers by
the sonorous and insistent notes
of the bugler blowing reveille.

New to the game they had
left their easy civilian life to
play, none of the raw "rookies"
stirred from their beds with the
sole exception of a little south-
ern lad from New Orleans, who
sitting up in his cot rubbing his
eyes, remarked to the sleeping
forms around him, "You all
bettah get up-dat ain't yoh
mothah cailin' you, boy, dat'
uncle talkin' to you

yoh

now!"

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Summer Schedule

Up and Down on the Broadway Joy Line
With L. M., Conductor

BUSINESS BEFORE PLEASURE-Eltinge.
Frenzied "fillums."

EYES OF YOUTH-Maxine. Elliott. Mar-
jorie Rambeau changes her personality
as often and as rapidly as an ordinary
woman can change her mind.
FANCY FREE-Bijou-Clifton Crawford
and Ada May Weeks register this mood
by much singing and dancing.
FLO-FLO-Cort. To bring home the
clothing shortage to the thoughtless
public.
FOLLIES OF 1918-New Amsterdam. Mr.
Ziegfeld's annual salon of beauty.
GETTING TOGETHER-Shubert.
play of humor and sentiment from
"Over There" that is the real thing.
Also, some soldier songs that weren't
written by cabaret comedians.
GOING UP-Liberty. A cheerful farce,
which every now and then breaks into
catchy syncopations.
HITCHY KOO-Globe. Bright show that
is conscientiously happy-go-lucky.
KISS BURGLAR, THE.-Cohan. A beauti-
ful duchess develops democratic ten-
dencies.

A war

PARLOR, BEDROOM MAN WHO STAYED AT HOME, THE-48th

and BATH

with FLORENCE MOORE

COHAN & HARRIS W. 42nd St. Evs. 8:20.

Mats. Wed. and Sat. 2:20.
COHAN & HARRIS Present

Funniest American Comedy of Recent Years

Street. He puts a secret agency of
Hohenzollern & Co. out of business.
MAYTIME-Broadhurst. Romance going
on as usual during the absence of the
regular New York Company, the
Chicago troupe pluckily holding their
places for them.

A TAILOR-MADE MAN MIDNIGHT FROLIC-Cocoanut Grove. The

Extremely Novel, Clever Play by

HARRY JAMES SMITH with GRANT MITCHELL

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rooftop sequel to the "Follies."
MIDNIGHT REVUE-Century Grove. In-
teresting after-theater rites.

OH, LADY, LADY!-Casino. A little Prin-
cess show summering at the big Casino.

AL JOLSON IN "SINBAD" PARLOR, BEDROOM AND BATH-Republic.

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A

with
MARJORIE
RAMBEAU

Broadway and 45th Street. Evenings 8:15
Matinees Wednesday and Saturday 2:15

A strange pilgrimage to a Jersey road

house.

RAINBOW GIRL, THE-Gaiety. Jerome
K. Jerome comedy overlaid with tunes.
ROCK-A-BYE BABY-Astor. Nursery classic
rhapsodied into a musical show.
SEVENTEEN-Booth. Mooning Willie Bax-
ter discovers that his Baby-Talk Lady
has a heart for none but Flopit.
SINBAD-Winter Garden. Al Jolson, with
hardly another man in sight.

MUSICAL ROCK-A-BYE BABY TAILOR-MADE MAN, A-Cohan & Harris.

COMEDY

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UDGE was one of the three
most popular publications in the
camps in a list including all the
leading magazines

"The happy medium," Judge, furnishes
welcome relaxation for war-strung nerves.

Stick a Ic stamp on the cover of this issue,
according to Postmaster Burleson's advice,
and drop in the mail; the Government will send
it to soldiers or sailors at the front. Do this
every week, and you'll make life that much
cheerier for the men in camp and "over there."
Or send us a dollar and a soldier's or
sailor's name and address - either at camp
or at the front - and we'll send him the next
13 issues.
Address

Judge, 225 Fifth Avenue, New York City

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Payable in advance or by draft on New York, or by express
or postal order.

The contents of JUDGE are protected by copyright in both
the United States and Great Britain.

If JUDGE cannot be found at any newsstand, the publishers
will be under obligation if that fact be promptly reported on
postal card or by letter.

BACK NUMBERS: Present year, 10 cents per copy; 1917
10 cents; 1916, 20 cents, etc.

Postage free in the United States, its dependencies, and Mex-
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that purpose.

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