have the benefit of the forfeiture. Such a fool is a dangerous beast, if others have the keeping of him, and The must be very undexterous, if, when her husband fhall refolve to be an afs, fhe does not take care he may be her ass. But the must go fkilfully about it, and above all things take heed of diftinguishing in public. what a kind of hufband he is. Her inward thoughts. must not hinder the outward payment of the confideration that is due to him. Her flighting him in company, befides that it would to a difcerning by-ftander give too great encouragement for the making nearer applications to her, is in itfelf fuch an indecent way of affuming, that it may provoke the fame creature to break loofe, and to fhew his dominion for his credit, which he was content to forget for his eafe. In fhort the fureft and most approved method will be to do like a wife minister to an eafy prince, firft give him the orders you afterwards receive from him. With all this, that which a wife is to pray for, is a wife hufband, one that by knowing how to be a mafter, for that very reafon will not let her feel the weight of it: one whofe authority is fo foftened by his kindness, that it gives her eafe without abridging her liberty: one that will: return fo much tenderness for her juft efteem of him,. that the will never want power, though the will feldom care to use it. Such a husband is as much above all the other kinds of them, as a rational fubjection to a prince is to be preferred before the difquiet and uneafi-. nefs of unlimited liberty, And fuch a gentle and reafonable dominion in the husband, is as much above the lordly and domineering fuperiority affected by fome men, over their wives, as a juft and lawful authority is preferable to an abfolute and arbitrary tyranny.

t

Before I leave this head, I will add a word or two, more concerning the wife's behaviour to her husband's, friends, which requires the most refined part of her understanding to acquit herfelf well of it. She is to, study how to live with them, with more care than fhe

iss

is to apply to any other part of her life; efpecially at firft, that the may not ftumble at the first fetting out. The family into which she is grafted will generally be apt to expect, that like a ftranger in a foreign country the fhould conform to their methods, and not bring in a new model by her own authority. The friends in fuch a cafe are tempted to rife up in arms as against an unlawful invasion, so that she is with the utmost caution to avoid the least appearance of any thing of this kind; and that she may with lefs difficulty afterwards give her directions, let her be fure at firft to receive them from her husband's friends. Let her gain them to her by early applying to them, and they will be fo fatisfied, that, as nothing is more thankful than pride when it is complied with, they will ftrive which of them fhall most recommend her. And when they have helpt her to take root in her husband's opinion, the will have less dependence upon theirs, tho' fhe muft not neglect any reasonable means of preferving it. She is to confider that a man governed by his friends, is very eafily inflamed by them; and that one who is not so, will yet for his own fake expect to have them confidered. It is easily improved to a point of honour in a hufband, not to have his relations neglected, and nothing is more dangerous than to raise an objection which is grounded upon pride; it is the moft ftubborn and lafting paffion we are fubject to, and where it is the firft caufe of the war, it is very hard to make a fecure peace. Her caution in this is of the last importance to

her.

And that the may the better fucceed in it, let her carry a Atrict eye upon the impertinence of her fervants; take heed that their ill-humour may not engage her to take exceptions, or their too much affuming in fmall matters raise confequences which may bring her under great difadvan a rage Remember that in the cafe of a royal bride, thofe about her are generally fo far fufpected to bring in a foreign interest that in most coun

tries.

tries they are infenfibly reduced to a very fmall number, and those of fo low a figure, that it does not admit the being jealous of them. In little, and in the proportion, this may be the cafe of every new-married woman, and therefore it may be more adviseable for her to gain the fervants fhe finds in a family, than to tie herself too fast to those she carries into it.

A prudent woman will not overlook these reflexions, because they may appear fmall and inconfiderable; for it may be faid, that as the greatest streams are made up of the small drops at the head of the fprings from whence they are derived, fo the greateft circumftances of her life will be in fome degree directed by these feeming trifles, which having the advantage of being the first acts of it, have a greater effect than fingly in their own nature they could pretend to.

Let all wives, as much as nature will give them leave, forget the great indulgence they have found at home. After fuch a gentle difcipline as they have been generally under from fond parents, they will diflike every thing that feems to be harfher to them. The tenderness of kind parents is of another nature, and differing from that which they will meet with firft in any family into which they fhall be tranfplanted; and yet they may be very kind too, and afford no juftifiable reafon for the complaint. Wives must not be frightened with the first appearances of a differing fcene, for when they are used to it, they may like the house they go to better than that they left, and their husband's friends will have fo much advantage of their parents, that the latter will yield up the competition; and, as well as they love her, every father and mother will be glad to furrender their daughter to fuch a rival.

The

The

MOTHER.

HE first confideration we should have, in re

ence to the laws of god, to please him, and to render ourfelves fo acceptable in his fight as may fecure us not only a prefent but a future happiness.

And tho' the reflexions we have already made have been intermixed with fuch as have been purely civil, and related only to temporal life, yet our main view has been to the eternal one; for whatever tends to virtue tends alfo to falvation..

The principal care of the mother being to educate her children well, let us in the first place obferve, that when they are injoined to bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the lord, it is according to the letter,. to bring them up in the chriftian religion, to teach them their duty, what they are to believe and practice: to instruct them in the knowledge of God and Jefus Chrift, to shew them in what condition they are by nature, and to what they are advanced by grace. This is the greatest teftimony of love that parents can fhew their children, the greatest kindness they can do them, the greatest bleffing and the best inheritance they can bestow upon them. Without this it is a little thing to fay, that neither wisdom, riches, honours, nor any thing befides can make them happy, for without this they will with all the rest be miserable.

Would you, parents, have your children honour you, and behave themselves obediently, and as becomes them in all respects? Bring them up then in the fear and

nurture

nurture of the Lord; teach them the Chriftian law, let them read and be converfant in the holy fcriptures, they will there fee their duty, they will there find fuch leffons of inftruction, fuch great encouragements and promises of vaft rewards, as will fecure their honour and respect, their service and obedience to their parents. By nurture and admonition of the Lord, may also be understood fuch a religious reproof and caftigation of children as is agreeable to the doctrine and good fpirit of Chrift the Lord. Would you who are parents be honoured and obeyed by your children? take the courfes which are propereft for that purpose; do not think of bringing your defigns to pafs by being hard, morose, and always out of humour with them, by treating them inhumanly and cruelly, by difcouraging them continually with frowns and ill-looks, with tauntings and up-. braidings, with threats and chaftifements: they will not need fo great feverities, fuch flavish ufage, fuch daily. menaces of difinheriting and cafting off, and fuch like rugged and illiberal treatment as is fometimes fhewn them. These things do often but inflame them, and exafperate them to greater contumacy, extinguish by de-. grees their natural piety and affections, make them avoid your fight, fly from you as from mischief, to dread like an executioner, shake off the yoke as foon as poffibly they can, and if not hate, yet never love you more. They will be won with better arguments than thefe, you may fecure their honour and obedience better by more natural and gentle methods. Give them fuch good inftructions as you find in facred writ; remember them of God's commands to honour and obey their parents; admonish them from thence, with the spirit of meekness, to take good heed to their ways, how they tranfgrefs the laws of God by difobeying their parents commands when juft and reasonable, and how they shall one day be put to anfwer for the neglectful or contemptuous breach of them. Lay but at first this good religious foundation in their minds, and you may build upon it for ever after; it will

you

hold