them. I know it is often made a compact in fuch matches, that neither fhall impofe their opinion upon the other; yet I doubt it is feldom kept, unless it be by thofe whofe carelessness of all religion abates their zeal to any one; but where they have any earnestnefs in their way, especially where one party thinks the other in a damnable error, it will scarce be poffible to reftrain endeavouring to reduce them; and that endeavour begets difputes, thofe difputes heats, thofe heats difgufts, and thofe difgufts perhaps end in averfion, by which means at last their affections grow as unreconcileable as their opinions, and their religious jars draw on domeftick: befides, if none of thefe perfonal debates happen, yet the education of the children will be matter of difpute; the one parent will be ftill countermining the other, each feeking to recover the other's profelytes; nay it introduces faction into the inferior parts of the family too; the fervants, according to their different perfuafions, bandy in leagues and parties: thus it endangers, if not utterly deftroys, all concord in families; and this train of mischiefs fhould methinks be a competent prejudice against fuch matches.

There is yet a third particular, wherein any great difproportion is much to be avoided, and that is in years. The humours of youth and age differ fo widely, that there had need be a great deal of fkill to compofe the difcord into a harmony. When a young woman marries an old man, there are commonly jealoufies on the one part, and loathings on the other; and if there be not an eminent degree of discretion in one or both,. there will be perpetual disagreements: But this is a cafe that does not often happen, among thofe I now fpeak to; for though the avarice of parents fometimes forces maids upon fuch matches, yet widows who are their own choofers, feldom make fuch elections; the inequality among them commonly falls on the other fide, and old women marry young men. Indeed any marriage is in fuch a folly and dotage; they who muft: fuddenly

fuddenly make their beds in the dust, what should they think of a nuptial couch? to fuch the answer of the philofopher is oppofite, who being demanded what was the fittest time for marrying, replied, For the young not yet, for the old not at all.

But this dotage becomes perfect frenfy and madness, when they choose young husbands; this is an accumulation of absurdities and contradictions. The husband and the wife are but one perfon, and yet at once young and old, fresh and withered; it is a reverfing the decrees of nature; and therefore it was no ill anfwer, which Dionyfius the tyrant gave his mother, who in her age defigned fuch a match; that by his regal power he could not abrogate thofe of nature, or make it fit for her an old woman to marry a young man. It is indeed an inverfion of seasons, a confounding of the calendar, making a mungrel month of May and December, and the conjunction proves as fatal as its prodigious; it being fcarce ever seen, that fuch a match proves tolerably happy. Indeed it is not imaginable how it fhould; it is to be prefumed, fhe that marries fo, must marry meanly, no young man who does not need her fortune, will take her perfon; for tho' fome have the humour to give great rates for inanimate antiquities, yet none will take the living gratis. Thus fhe never miffes to be hated, by him the marries: he looks on her as his rack and torment, thinks himself under the lingring torture, devised by Mezentius, a living body tied to a dead. Nor muft fhe think to cure this by any the. little adulteries of art; fhe may buy beauty, and yet can never make it her own; may paint, yet never be fair. It is like enameling a mud-wall, the coarsenefs of the ground will spoil the varnish, and the greatest exquifitenefs of dress serves but to illuftrate her native blemishes; and thus all the gains by this is, to makehim fcorn her as well as abhor her.

What can be more ridiculous than an old woman gaily fet out? It was not unaptly faid by Diogenes to fuch a

one;

one; If this decking be for the living, you are deceived; if for the dead, make hafte to them ;' and I doubt not many young husbands will be ready to fay as much. Death fometimes comes not quick enough to preventan illegal parting. The man bids adieu to the wife, tho' not to her fortune, takes that to maintain the luxuries elsewhere, allows her fome little annuity, and makes her a penfioner to her own eftate. Thus he has his defign, but the has none of hers; he married for her fortune, and has it; fhe for his perfon, and has it not, and which is worse, buys her defeat with the lofs of all, he commonly leav ing her as empty of money as he found her of wit.

This condition is deplorable enough, and yet ufually it fails even of that comfort, which is the last reserve of the miferable, I mean pity; it is the wifeman's quef tion, Who will pity a charmer, that is bitten with a ferpent?' He might have prefumed lefs on his skill, and kept himself at a fafer diftance; and fore the like may be faid of her. Alas! what are feeble charms, that fhe fhould expect by them to fix the giddy appetites of youth and fince fhe could fo prefume without fenfe, none will regret fhe fhould be convinced by fmart. Befides, this is a cafe wherein there have been a multitude of unhappy precedents, which might have cautioned her. He that accidentally falls down an undifcovered precipice, is pitied for his difafter; but he who ftands a great while on the brink of it, looks down, and fees the bottom firewed with the mingled carcafes of many that have thence fallen, if he fhall deliberately caft himfelf into their company, the blame quite ex'inguishes the pity he may aftonifh, but not melt the beholders. And truly the who calls herfelf away in fuch a match, betrays not lefs but more wilfulness. How many ruins of unhappy women prefent themfelves to her, like the wrecks of old veffels, all fplit upon this rock and if fhe will needs fteer her courfe purpofely to do the fame, none ought to grudge her the fhipwreck the fo courts.

Nor

Nor has the only this negative discomfort, to be deprived of pity, but fhe is loaded with cenfures and reproach; the world is apt enough to run into malicious errors, to fix blame where there is none, but it is feldom guilty of the charitable, does not overlook the fmallest appearance of evil, but generally puts the worst conftruction upon any act, that it will with any probability bear; and according to that measure women in this condition can expect no very mild defcants upon them; fuch matches are fo deftitute of any rational plea, that it is hard to derive them from any other motive than the fenfitive. What the common conjectures are in that cafe, is as needlefs as it is unhandfome to declare ; I will not fay how true they are, but if they be, it adds: another reason to the former, why fuch marriages are unprofperous. All diflortions in nature are ufually. ominous, and fure fuch preter-natural heats in age, may very well be reckoned as difmal prefages, and very certain ones too, fince they create the ruin they foretel: It is not only juft but convenient, that fuch motives fhould be attended with fuch confequences, that the bitterness of the one may occafion fome reflexion on the fordidnefs of the other; fuch an autumnal fpring might be thought a kind of miracle, if it did not meet with frofts, and the unpleafantnefs of the event did not chaftife the uglinefs of the defign. Wherefore, I think, thofe that are conscious of the one, fhould be fo far from murmuring, that they fhould be very thankful for the other, think it God's difcipline to bring them again to their wits, and not repine at that smart which themselves have made neceffary.

It were to be wifhed that all the ancienter widows. would feriously weigh how it is their intereft not to fever thofe two epithets. That of ancient they cannot put off, it daily grows upon them; and that of widow is fure a more proportionable adjunct to it, than that of wife, efpecially when it is to one to whom her age might have made her mother. There is a veneration

due

due to age, if it be fuch asdifowas not itself: The hoary • head is a crown of glory, if it be found in the way of ⚫ righteou nefs;' but when it will mixitfelf with youth, it is difclaimed by both, becomes the fhame of the old, and the fcorn of the young; what a ftrange fury is it then, which poffeffes fuch women, that when they may difpofe their fortunes to thofe advantageous defigns before-mentioned, they should only buy with them fo indecent, fo ridiculous a flavery; that when they may keep up the reputation of modefty and prudence, they should expose themselves to an univerfal contempt for the want of both, and that they who might have had reverence, fhould put themfelves even out of the capacity of a bare compaffion?

This is fo high a frenfy as fure cannot happen in an inftant, it must have fome, preparatory degrees, fome rooting in the conftitution and habit of the mind, fuch widows have fare fome lightness of humour, before they can be fo giddy in their brains, and therefore those that will fecure themselves from the effect, must subtract the caufe; if they will still be wifhing themselves young, it is odds but in a while hey will perfuade themfelves they are fo; let them therefore content themselves to be old, and as fashions are varied with times, fo let them put on the ornaments proper to their season, which are piety, gravity and prudence. Thefe will not only be their ornament but their armour too; thefe will gain them fuch a reverence, that will make it as improbable they fhould be affaulted, as impoffible they fhould affault, for, I think, one may fafely fay, it is the want of one or all of thefe, which be trays women to fuch marriages.

Indeed it may be a matter of caution even to the younger widows, not to let themselves too much loose to a light frolick humour, which perhaps they will not be able to put off, when it is most neceffary they fhould; it will not much invite a fober man to marry them while they are young, and if it continue with them till they are old, it may (as natural motions use) grow more vio.