sells the shirts and candy, and thar childun, a boy bein all thar family.

But thar is mo yit. Thar is a Mr. Oans, a yung man, a Cluk (all the yung men heer is Cluks, and a good menny ole men, ixcept sich as drives hax and sells oshters), a handsum fello, with a high farrud and pritty har on his hed, which be greezis it too much, it bein the fashun in toun. He doant apeer to have no mitey good opinyun uv ennything in this werld, and goes about and looks like a man which has wrepented uv bein bawn, but, bein proud, diddent intend to apollygyze fer it. He's a genrus fello, and eets more oshters uv a nite than enny five men in the sitty, and alwais wants me to eet with him, which I genrilly duz, not likin to hert his fealins. His room jines mine, and the verry day I got beer (Mr. Argruff tellin him I wuz frum Ferginny) he cum in and made me a presint uv a reel woodall pipe, a good wreed stem, and a hole chanse uv splendid Linch bug terbarker to smoak. I'm bleest to like him, and sense I got to smoakin his presint, it's felt a heap mo like hoam to me. Thar is redeemin pints about Washintun.

This heer Mr. Oans has got him a fren-a little ole dried up yung man uv a spishus coprus culler, which his name is Mr. Melloo, and he rites letters fur the knewspapus, called corrispondunce, and this are wun of the biggest biznesses in toun, ef I aint deseeved, which most likely I ar, fur the foax in Washintun are verry fond uv lyin on all subjicks. Mr. Melloo, he rooms heer too, makin uv no fuss and behavin jist like he wuz white, but lookin pryinly at me, whenuvver he gits a chanse, precisely like wun thease heer inkwissy tiv little tan-culled beegles. I wondur ef he suspisshuns enny thing? Consoun his sole! he'd better tend too his oan bizniss and let me alone. I got nuthin to doo with him and doant want nuthin.

So you sea, Billy, this hous are pritty well stufft with specimins uv vayus peepil. And howdyou reckin I cum to know so much about um? Why, the gearl that wates on my room, she tole me. She's white as enny lady, speeks

Ishmun languidge and cums frum thar, and Billy she's plegg-taked handsum. Duz mo wirk, is helthier, smarter, fuller uv good yumur, and better lookin than enny boddy I seen yit. She's name wuz Mayan, and I and her has a tauk evvry day. This elustraits the diffrents between Nothun and Suthun peepil, havin white mades heer, tho thar's a good chanse uv niggers too, while we all has cullud mades, likely mlatters freakwently.

Fur the ferst few dais I were so shamed to sea this pritty gearl fixin up my bed and histin cole on my stove, I cuddint speek, and when I did speek (askin how to git in at nite, when the dough was shet on the streat) she seen frum my tremblin vois and gentmunny mannur that I thought I was talkin to a reel lady, and sense then she's got a great fantsy to me. She's got blak har, wavin, blak eyes, that is brite and quick-movin as litenin, and smart? I jist tell you, she's a reglar Spannish needle of a gearl. You git to foolin arfter her, like Mr. Oans and Melloo, ptickly Oans, which is alwais tryin to out do her in sayin smart things-and I be bound you think you've ketcht a razur by the blaid instid uv the handil. I think it were Chusdy mornin I heerd Mr. Oans sayin to her-he's verry fond askin her kunnundrums and speakin broag like they do in her kuntry. He sais:

"Well now, Marry," he sais, "will you tell me won thing?" "Shure," she sais, "I'm glad yure afther increesin yure infermashin. What's it, Misther Oans?"

"Well," he sais, "ken you tell me who wuz the father of Zebby dee's childun."

"The father of Zebby dee's childer?” she sais. "Faith, I don't wonder you're askin. I think he was a ghentilman”meanin by this, Billy, that Mr. Oans want akwaintid with no gentilmen.

But this aint nuthen to what she sais sumtimes; I wisht I cood remember her sayins, but they is so keen you can't ketch holt uv um even with yo mine. In the weak dais, when she's cleenin up the rooms-she atends to the hole hous-uv koas she cant look verry nise, but you jest

orto sea her drest up uv a Sundy. By jings! it duz me good, yes, good to look at her. And plegg take her! she knows it. Dernd ef ole Mr. Kongissmun Swomplans doant watch her reglar throo his winder as she goes up the streat to the Kathlick church. He's rite, too; Oans and Melloo duz the saim thing, and goes long to church with her sum times at nite. This 'll kinder strike you as goin too fur, but pupil duz jest is they plees in Washintun, and noboddy dont keer nuthin fur noboddy nor nuthin.

Mayan she sleeps up stars with that ar ole woman, and it ar a cuyus fac, Billy, that wun uv these heer terryfine ole wimmin is kep in evvry bodin hous in Washintun. They tries to hide um, so that felloes cummin to git rooms cant sea um, but the miserbul, po creturs kin alwais tell when ennyboddy is a lookin aroun, and will poke thur ole skeer-faces out uv sum hole or ruther.

I'm a givin you a long akount uv all thease peepil in oddur to give you a idee uv the way things is dun heer and the kind uv foax that lives in the sitty. Now skeersly nun uv we all eets at this heer hous whar we sleap, but gits our meals at anuther hous, cunsernin which I'm a goin to tell you in my nexks letter. Less change the subjick.

When I fust got heer, Injuns was all the go-Pawknees, Soos, Potty wotty mees, Socks and Focksis, and I dunno how menny mo, about 20 or 30 in number, all drest up in wred blankits, fethers, paintid faces, wrings in thar years, bar's claws, mokkysins, tommyhawks, and so forth and setry-reel Injuns, Billy. I dun seen um till I'm tide, and they doant intruss me no mo. Jeemony! how yaller and ugley they is, and how the ladies duz luv to look at um and shake thar hands! You needent tell me bout they bein Abboridgyknees, and the lost Ten Tribes uv Jeus, spoke uv in the Bibil. They is nuthin in the wirld but mlatters which run way from thar marsters a long tiem ago and dun run wild like hogs in a mounten. That's what they is, and you can't fool me, and make me bleeve yo fantsyful storis bout um. No sir ree, I used to think they wuz red like boys that's

paintid thar fase with poak-berries, but they aint, they is yaller mlatters, and nuthin else.

Nex to the Injuns, it cum nachrul fur me to pay my wrispecks to the public bildins, which thar is a grate menny uv, bilt most in ginrully uv marvel, and wood be a site to sea ef you cood cum acrost um suddinly in a piney wood, like that betwixt Passin Merrydith's and Ganwy's Mill, but heer is verry commun indeed and nuthin out'n the way. Is I sed befo, nun uv um aint finisht, not even the Captul, and pun top uv nearly all uv um thar is things sumthin like the big kingpost to a sale vessil, only bigger, but mo like the figger 4 trigger to a imments partrich trap, only wun peese are a roap instid uv wood. But the bildins aint traps that I know uv, ixcept to ketch munny, and theese heer big triggers is intendid to hiest rock. You've sean the like on a wrail-rode; thar wuz wun at Bufflo Bridge, this side uv Fomvil. It ar custumerry fur strangers to go ferst to the Patint Offis, which I went along, uv koas, and seen sites I tell you--two or three milyuns uv curosties frum all parts uv the gloab, and a heap mo moddils uv masheens, all in glase casis. Berds and beests, munkis and snaiks, rocks and figgers and pictshers, and evvry thing doun' to ole Genrul Washintun's solgir close, and skreech owils and aags. Ded peepil too, and heds cut off, and humin bones, horryfine to behole.

The mornin I were up thar, Mr. Oans he were thar, and I warnt akwaintid with him then, but follerd long behine, apeerintly without intendin it, becas he wuz with sum ladies and what they all sed ixplained things to me. Peard like the ladies, wun uv um, wuz mighty smart and yumrus, laffin and makin Mr. Oans laff, in his dont keer way, at what she sed. I coodint begin to tell you wun haf uv it all, but wun thing I were bleest to remember, it struck me so foasbly. Goin roun wun uv the glass casis, she wremarkt "Law, Mr. Oans, doo cum heer, and look at this."

He went roun, and I heer him inquier. He says:

"Well, what is it?"

She sais, talkin like a little chile, jist learnin:

“Why," she sais, "jes look doun thair at them mair's aags-aint they mair's aags ?"

Ashoridly," he sais, "and ef you wuz to tern wun uv um over, it wood be a colt's revolver."

Then they all bust out a laffin predidgus, but I diddint sea no cents in it. Presinly they went on, and I went roun and lookt. Sho nuf, it were a aag big nuf to be a mar's aag, (a hoss mar, I meen,) but I don't bleeve wun word uv it. I nurver sean no mar settin on no ness hatchin no colts, and you nuther.

They all walkt on into the masheen room, whar they diddint stay long, but lef me thar lookin at the wheals, and spokes, and jigamarigs untwill my hed farly whirld. Arfter keerful igsaminashin, I coodint say I thought much uv enny uv theese invenshins, which posbly sum uv um may be verry good fur the presint. I went away frum thar, but go thar okashunly when I git loansome, which Mr. Oans he sais a pawnbroker, (whatevver that is,) is verry apt to be loansome.

All this tiem you may be certin I were keepin a sharp look out fur my bizniss. Wun tiem, I had a grate mine to tell Mr. Argruff, but arfter wreflecktin tho't I'd better sey nuthen too soon. Neether hav I menshind ennythin to enny uv our Ferginny Kongissmun, which I've bin interjuiced to, Mr. Letchur, Mr. Bocox frum our deestric, Mr. Powl, Mr. Edmund's sun, Mr. Clemmings, Jedge Casky, and them; all wise, kine hartid gentilmen, willin to do enny thing fur you they ken. Sum uv um I got akwaintid with befo I lef Broun's tavun, wun day when I were takin sperrits, pritty good too, heap bettern that at the Junkshin, with Mr. Argruff. They jined verry perlitely, and, heerin whar I were frum, commenst on pollytix, askin how I stood. You know how a good drink takes the bashful out uv a fello, so I torked rite up to them grate Kongissmen jis like I wood to pupil baun and raist at crost rodes. I tole um I were a outenout, ole fashin, strait up and doun, staits rite, Jacksin, Kansis dimmokrat,

bleevin in nuthin but whut the party bleevd in, votin fur a dimmokrat aginst enny boddy, I doant keer hoo.

"That's rite," they sais, "you stick to that, and doant truss too much to yo oan idees and you'll alwais be rite."

I sais, "I thank you," and we all mendid our drinks, and I want nigh as bashful as I were at fust. So I assd um a questchin which had botherd me mitely, soon arfter I got to Washintun whar evvry boddy torks pollytix and you's bleeged to heer mo or less uv what they tork about. I sais:

'Gentilmen, sense I cum heer, evvry boddy a most is acusin uv evvry boddy uv bein uv a dimmy jog; what ar a dimmy jog, ar it a kind uv dimmokrat or a vessil that holes licker?"

This apeerd to amews um mitely, and wun sed, laffin, that my urror were verry commun, becos it aint evvry man which knows the diffrents between a dimmy jog and a dimmokrat."

He sais, speakin to me, S'e, "The true diffrents is verry simple, and kin be ixplaind in a breth. Whoever gits elected is a dimmy jog, and whoever gits defeatid is a paytriot. D'you understand?"

I tole him "sertnly," but, I sais, "I've heerd these heer dimmy jogs abused so much and the Gnashnul dimmokrats abused so much, that I begun to think they wuz the same thing identikilly."

"Oh no!" he sais, "you must by no meens entertane sech apinyun. The Gnashnul Dimmockracy, altho they've bin electid and hole the powur uv guvvunmint, air not dimmy jogs; they air ixcepshins to the genril rool; they air the grate party, and however troo it may be that the party is sumwhat divided Noth and South, yet air they inknucksorubbly conjined together by this verry divishin, and stronger than they wood be without it."

I had to studdy over this sum tiem befo I cood understand how a thing cood be jined by a divishin. At lass I sais:

"I think I sea thoo yo observashin. The Gnashnul dimmockracy uv the Noth and the South are jined together like the rooms in a jale-by a thik, unpassibul