PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHIARIVARI. THE PRIVILEGE OF PIC-NICS. To the DUKE OF CAMBRIDGE, Ranger of Richmond Park. MAY IT PLEASE YOUR ROYAL HIGHNESS, Hot water, for tea parties, is to be had gratis at the Lodge from the DUKE OF CAMBRIDGE's own tea-kettle. It is one of your many distinguishing virtues that you love a good dinner. I have seen you many times exercising that love with a heartiness that would put bowels into a mummy. You are, I understand, to be painted as a jovial BRIAREUS for the refreshment room of the House of Lords, with a hundred jolly faces smiling, glowing, reddening, lip-smacking, over a hundred different plates,-and a hundred hands carving the hundred delicacies of the four seasons. MACLISE is to do the heads; and LANDSEER the roast pigs, ducks, geese, and all the other animals that continually come whole to dinner. LAURIE is spoken of for the fruit; and the mouths of unborn men will water at his grapes, his pines, his peaches, and his m lons. All this is rightadmirable; in excellent taste: worthy of the House of Lords, and wisely commemorative of your Royal Highness's knife-and-fork ame--leave no broken glass. rities. No man has eaten more dinners in the cause of charity, and until the end of your days-hat is, if an end shall ever be-may gout respectfully avoid you! May the demon never shake so much as your little toe, and indigestion hold you in profoundest reverence! But But, your Royal Highness, is it possible that, as Ranger of Richmond Park, you forbid the laying of a table-cloth on the greensward, and-by means of your keepers-carry consternation into the hearts of parties nic-nic? Is this right of the DUKE OF CAMBRIDGE-the Duke of the Freemasons' Tavern-of the London ditto-of the Crown and Anchor -the Thatched House-he Clarendon-the Blue Posts-the Elephant and Castle-the Pig-and-Whistle, and all the other hostelries? (to be duly noted by PETER CUNNINGHAM in his new Knife-and-Fork-Book of London,)-whose rooftrees have resounded to your laugh, whose lares and penates have shaken their sides at your inexhaustible flow of humour -your catarac's of wit ? GOOD HEALTH TO ALL. N. B. Parties are earnestly requested not to leave their bones behind. Vivat Regina: Good Night, and Happy Dreams. This, may it please your Royal Highness, is the sort of notice for a demesne, of which the jolly DUKE OF CAMBRIDGE is Ranger, and this notice-he expects-will gladden his eyes, when Richmond Park is By your Humble Servant, Friend, and Councillor, next visited, PUNCH. DRAMATIC NEWS. THE New York Literary World publishes an astounding piece of news: nothing less than a statement that London dramatic authors-(how many authors would be left if war once broke out between the Palais Royal and the Burlington Arcade)-intend to "hold their works," that Can your Royal Highness enjoy your green peas with the gusto that is, not to print them; in order that American managers may not play you and green peas are equally worthy of,-reflecting that a Richmond them cost-free. What a notable device! Why, before SIR BULWER Park-keeper has warned off JOHN STUBBS, tailor, MRS. STUBBS, and LYTTON's Act, many dramatists did not print their pieces; and what children, MRS. STUBBS having laid the cloth upon Richmond grass, was the result? Why, miserable garbled copies were obtained by a and about to lay upon that a sweet bit of cold lamb with her first goose- go-between agent, and thus the authors were not only robbed, but berry pie of the season? Is this wise-is it just-is it kind, your murdered. So would it fare with authors who nominally "hold their Royal Highness? In a word, is it like the jolly, good-hearted DUKE works" in England; being really plundered and bu chered by the OF CAMBRIDGE? What! shall the champagne frizz and foam to your American managers; most of whom, by the way, are Englishmen; and "therefore may believe they have a patriotic right to defraud their counroyal mouth at the Freemasons', and shall not bottled porter cry "pop sub tegmine fagi in Richmond shades? Yet this notice, like a death's trymen of their own. head, stares and mockingly grins in the lengthened faces of perplexed holiday-makers : V. RICHMOND PARK. NOTICE. R. Persons riding or driving in the Park are requested to keep the line of the gravelroads. If riding or driving over the grass across the Park, they will be considered as trespassers, and dealt with accordingly. If horses are taken off from carriages, the keepers and constables have orders to impound them. No dogs admitted unless they are led All dogs found bunting or straggling will be shot. We have a respect for the English crown-especially regard the gracious gentlewoman who adorns it, and that we have a respect, we have in proportion a sorrow to see the crown placed as a scarecrow to homely happiness. And so, your Royal Highness, you will immediately think the matter over, and we doubt not even ere the chestnuts shall have dropt their blossoms (what a glory, what a floral illumination, while we write, is burning in Busby Park)-the ugly notice frowning above will be taken down; and in its place, the notice subjoined, with the illustrations faithfully copied : Persons coming here, are ordered to enjoy themselves. They are commanded, as faithful subjects, to bring with them an ample supply of the best they can afford of meat and drink; from venison and champagne, to cold mutton and bottled porter. All Up with the Reds. THE Parisian Boulevards are to be macadamised-not so much for the purpose of making the population mend their ways, but in order that the general breaking-up of the large stones may prevent the success of any future outbreak. MACADAM is the great enemy of the barricades after all, since his invention will be the cause of a split or general break-up of those constant friends to the Red party-the paving-stones of the Metropolis. The spirit, or rather the unhappy ghost of poor Liberty will in vain call upon the very stones to rise in Paris, as they have often risen before on former occasions. THE CHARITY-SCHOOL OF ART. OUR olfactory moral sense is greatly outraged by a number of enThe vile odour progravings, to be seen in almost every print-shop window, representing charity children in various devotional postures. ceeding from these works is that of sordid plagiarism, mingled with the affectation of a sort of pious sentiment, which may be called three choristers chanting: the young gentlemen of the choir were parochial. Some little time ago, a print was published, representing idealised specimens; the thing was rather pretty, and becane very popular. Since then, Town has been over-run with engravings of charity children, male and female, saying their prayers, and repeating collects and responses. Every clause in the Belief is threatened with being illustrated in this nauseous manner. One idea has been successful, and, as usual, a host of imitative speculators set to work to produce "something like it." On the same mean principle, some snob, a short time ago, when GEORGE CRUICKSHANK had treated us to "The Bottle," was understood to contemplate bringing out "The Bible." There is something peculiarly disgusting in the attempt to get a "run "out of the Scriptures and the Book of pathies of the public. Superadd to this the singular offensiveness of the Common Prayer, and in trying trade "dodges" on the religious symappeal to that vulgarity of taste and feeling which is gratified by the exhibition of charity children, in their ridiculous and degrading costume, playing pretty. Seemingly, there are persons whose ideas of Art are derived literally from the National School. For the express delectation of such, our Artist has been so kind as to draw these Sentimental Charity Boys. who speak truthfully for themselves, instead of chanting or canting. To these three Graces of the " Charitable Grinders," our said Artist, with a marvellous appreciation of the class of mind to which he addresses himself, has added a arochial APOLLO in the shape of a Lackadaisical Beadle. LEGISLATIVE LITTLENESS. THE new House of Commons, though intended for the making of Statutes at large, is so constructed as to render necessary the making of statues in little. SIR BENJAMIN HALL having visited the studio of a sculp'or employed on the stone figures, intended to adorn the walls of Parliament, was struck by the fact that many of the greatest characters of English history appear so remarkably narrow-shouldered, that they could never have sustained the weight of their own heads, much less the weight of public affairs, that had been thrown upon them. When SIR BENJAMIN asked for an explanation, he was informed that the statutes had been made to measure, according to certain niches allowed by the architect, who leaving ample room for the stretching of the legs, had provided for extremely contracted chests, among the illustrious individuals whom the artist had undertaken to chisel. The result is, that many of the statues will have the appearance of sugar-loaves; and most of the distinguished men will seem as if they had been purposely pinioned or trussed for the roasting that criticism will inflict upon them. It is very hard upon such a man as HAMPDEN, for instance, to be limited to a few inches from shoulder to shoulder, when in life he demanded elbow-room for all, and won his celebrity, by his regard for liberal measures. Historical accuracy will be much impaired by the placing of various political characters in such a position as to leave them no room to turn round, though they may have been notorious for their adroitness in that movement. Some of the statues have been so curtailed of their fair proportions by the regulations as to size, that the wellknown political wa'chword of " Measures, not men," would be applicable to the greater part of them. WAR TO THE KNIFE AND FORK. A BANQUET was lately held in aid of the furds of King's College Hospital, and the following notice was published for several days afterwards : KING'S COLLEGE HOSPITAL. "NOTICE-The hats and coats left at the dinner of the above Hospital, have been removed to the Hospital." Such was the energy and enthusiasm of the supporters of the charity, that they determined to stock it with a quantity of patients at once, and that this might be done without pain to anybody, the patients selected were inanima'e. Ha's with broken crowns, coa's with the loss of an arm, frowsers with a lacerated leg, and pantaloons with seats looking like the seats of war, were gathered in large nunbers, and as it appears by the notice we have given above, were dispatched to the Hospital. We might extend the dismal catalogue with bi's of shirts torn at the bosom, and rent to mere ribbons streaming with gore and gusset, to say nothing of gloves cruelly b reft of fingers, and pockethandkerchiefs prematurely mangled. It is satisfactory, however, to feel that the sufferers were removed to the Hospital, from which we can imagine the issue of a series of bulletins in the following fashion: "The hats have enjoyed a tolerable long nap, and the wounded arms of some of the coa's having been sewn up, are progressing towards recovery. Several of the trowsers have been discharged cured, with no other appearance of having suffered but a stitch in the side, which is nearly imperceptible. Several shirts with a gathering in the neck which had been unhappily torn open, have been restored under an application of fresh cotton. Very few of the sufferers are past recovery, but we regret to say that an aged paletôt was so much shat ered in the affray, that it was found impossible to bring it to, by making it one again." ART IN PARLIAMENT. We have all respect for the genius of MR. EDWIN LANDSEER, but when LORD MAHON calls him the first painter of the age, it does appear to Punch :hat it is sending Art a little too much to the dogs. THE YORK COLUMN. Lillle Boy. PAPA, why does the DUKE OF YORK stand Father. Self-defence, my dear. To keep off his creditors. who may be safely recommended as a s'udy to the necessitous draughtsmer, whose with his sword drawn? pov. rty of resources has driven them to throw themselves on the parish. |