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certain prelate, who, notwithstanding his confinement, still preserves his healthy cheerful countenance, cannot come in time to be a nurse at court.

I likewise earnestly entreat the maids of honour, (then ensigns and captains of the guards) that at their first setting out, they have some regard to their former station; and do not run wild through all the infamous houses about town: that the present grooms of the bed-chamber (then maids of honour) would not eat chalk and lime in their green-sickness and, in general, that the men would remember they are become retromingent, and not by inadvertency lift up against walls and posts.

Petticoats will not be burdensome to the clergy; but balls and assemblies will be indecent for some time.

As for you, coquettes, bawds, and chambermaids (the future ministers, plenipotentiaries, and cabinetcounsellors to the princes of the earth), manage the great intrigues that will be committed to your charge, with your usual secrecy and conduct; and the affairs of your masters will go better than ever.

O ye exchange-women!* (our right worshipful representatives that are to be) be not so griping in the sale of your ware as your predecessors, but consider that the nation, like a spendthrift heir, has run out be likewise a little more continent in your tongues than you are at present, else the length of debates will spoil your dinners.

You housewifely good women who now preside over the confectionary (henceforth commissioners of the treasury), be so good as to dispense the sugarplums of the government with a more impartial and frugal hand.

* Exeter-Change was tenanted, at this time, by a number of sempstresses, and other female dealers in haberdashery, who kept small shops or booths there.

Ye prudes and censorious old maids (the hopes of the bench), exert but your usual talent of finding faults, and the laws will be strictly executed; only I would not have you proceed upon such slender evidences as you have done hitherto.

It is from you, eloquent oyster-merchants of Billingsgate (just ready to be called to the bar, and coifed like your sister serjeants), that we expect the shortening the time, and lessening the expenses of lawsuits; for I think you are observed to bring your debates to a short issue; and even custom will restrain you from taking the oyster, and leaving only the shell to your client.

O ye physicians! who in the figure of old women are to clean the tripe in the markets, scour it as ef fectually as you have done that of your patients, and the town will fare most deliciously on Saturdays.

I cannot but congratulate human nature upon this happy transformation: the only expedient left to restore the liberties and tranquillity of mankind. This is so evident, that it is almost an affront to common sense to insist upon the proof: if there can be any such stupid creature as to doubt it, I desire he will make but the following obvious reflection. There are in Europe alone, at present, about a million of sturdy fellows, under the denomination of standing-forces, with arms in their hands: that those are masters of the lives, liberties, and fortunes of all the rest, I believe nobody will deny. It is no less true in fact, that reams of paper, and above a square mile of skins of vellum, have been employed to no purpose to settle peace among those sons of violence. Pray who is he that will say unto them, " go and disband yourselves?" but lo! by this transformation it is done at once, and the halcyon days of public tranquillity return: for neither the military temper nor discipline can taint the soft sex for a whole age

to come: bellaque matribus invisa, wars odious to mothers, will not grow immediately palatable in their paternal state.

Nor will the influence of this transformation be less in family tranquillity than it is in national. Great faults will be amended; and frailties forgiven on both sides. A wife, who has been disturbed with late hours, and choked with the haut-gout of a sot, will remember her sufferings, and avoid the temptations; and will for the same reasons indulge her mate, in his family capacity, in some passions, which she is sensible from experience are natural to the sex; such as vanity, fine clothes, being admired, &c. And how tenderly must she use her mate under the breeding qualms and labour-pains which she hath felt herself? In short, all unreasonable demands upon her husband must cease, because they are already satisfied, from natural experience that they are impossible.

That the ladies may govern the affairs of the world, and the gentlemen those of their household, better than either of them have hitherto done, is the hearty desire of

Their most sincere well-wisher,

M. S.

SPECIMEN OF SCRIBLERUS'S REPORTS. *

STRADLING versus STILES.

Le report del case argue en le commen banke devant tout les justices de le mesme banke, en le quart. an du raygne de roy Jaques, entre Matthew Stradling, plant. et Peter Stiles, def. en un action propter certos equos coloratos, Anglicè pyed horses, post. per le dit Matthew vers le dit

Peter.

Le recitel SIR John Swale, of Swale-Hall in Swale del case. Dale fast by the River Swale, kt. made his Last Will and Testament: in which, among other bequests, was this, viz. Out of the kind love and respect that I bear unto my much honoured and good friend Mr Matthew Stradling, gent. I do bequeath unto the said Matthew Stradling, gent. all my black and white horses. The Testator had six black horses, six white horses, and six pyed horses.

*William Fortescue, Esq., who, in 1736, was made a baron of the exchequer, appears to have been among Mr Pope's most familiar and esteemed friends, and many letters to him are in the last edition of that Poet's works. He was, though a lawyer, a man of great humour, talents, and integrity. This whimsical case of the pyed horses, penned in ridicule of the old musty reports, was the joint composition of Mr Pope and Mr Fortescue. He is mentioned by Jarvis in a letter to Pope, where, speaking of Lady M. W. M. he says.

Sedente Gayo, et ridente Fortescuo.-BOWLES.

Le point.

The Debate therefore was, Whether or no the said Matthew Stradling should have the said pyed horses, by virtue of the said Bequests.

Atkins apprentice pour le pl. moy semble Pour le pl. que le pl. recovera.

And first of all it seemeth expedient to consider what is the nature of horses, and also what is the nature of colours; and so the argument will consequently divide itself in a twofold way, that is to say, the formal part, and substantial part. Horses are the substantial part, or thing bequeathed: black and white the formal or descriptive part.

Horse, in a physical sense, doth impart a certain quadruped or four-footed animal, which, by the apt and regular disposition of certain proper and convenient parts, is adapted, fitted, and constituted for the use and need of man. Yea, so necessary and conducive was this animal conceived to be to the behoof of the commonweal, that sundry and divers acts of parliament have from time to time been made in favour of horses.

1st Edw. VI. Makes the transporting of horses out of the kingdom, no less a penalty than the forfeiture of 401.

2d and 3d Edward VI. Takes from horse-stealers the benefit of their clergy.

And the Statutes of the 27th and 32d of Hen. VIII. condescend so far as to take care of their very breed: These our wise ancestors prudently foreseeing, that they could not better take care of their own posterity, than by also taking care of that of their horses.

And of so great esteem are horses in the eye of the common law, that when a Knight of the Bath committeth any great and enormous crime, his punishment is to have his spurs chopt off with a cleaver,

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