Imágenes de páginas
PDF
EPUB

his wife is so mute and unsocial as the shades of evening are gathering. And Mrs. B is at her "wits' end" to learn the reason her husband dislikes her company, and spends his evenings at the tavern. But, in both instances, the reason lies in the fact that they are habitual fretters or scolders. Many a man has been driven to the tavern, and his cups, and to a drunkard's grave, by a peevish and fretful wife. And many a wife has had her heart and hopes crushed, and been plunged in mental misery, by a similar crucl spirit on the part of her husband.

66

The following incidents are illustrative of an equable temper. A married man was spending the evening as usual with his jovial companions at the tavern. The conversation, in the course of the evening, was directed to the faults of their wives. One of the number declared, after a tart discourse upon the provocations of married life, that his wife was, nevertheless, a woman of remarkable good temper, and added, were I to take you gentlemen home with me at midnight, and order her to rise and get you a supper, she would be all submission and cheerfulness." The company were incredulous, and a wager was staked. So about midnight they started to make the experiment. Being admitted, "Where is your mistress?" said the husband to the maid servant who sat up for him. "She is gone to bed, sir!" "Call her up," said he. "Tell her I have brought some friends home with me, and desire she would get up, and prcpare them a supper." At once "the woman obeyed the unreasonable summons, and received the company with perfect civility; told them she happened to have some chickens ready for the spit, and supper should be prepared as soon as possible. The supper was accordingly served up; when she performed the honors of the table with as much cheerfulness as if she had expected company at a proper season." The husband won the wager, and such an exhibition of good temper resulted in making him a better man. It is one of

the rewards of obeying the Apostolic iujunction, “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord." Such a wife, amid the varied scenes of domestic" life, is a kind of moral talisman. She reminds us of "a certain aquatic plant which speads its top on the surface of the water, and with wonderful elasticity keeps the surface still, if the water swells or if it falls. “In her tongue is the law of kindness." She is like the statue of Memnon in Egypt, giving forth delightful sounds with every rising day, whether in sunshine or in storm. She reminds us of the

heavenly temper of our mother Eve, in her reception and entertainment of the angel Raphael. so gentle, so kind, so cheerful, so lovely. Not every husband is thus greeted with a smile, when he unexpectedly brings home even an angel, at a proper time, to dine.

Side by side with this example of an excellent wife, we may place the following example of a husband as happy in his temper. Bishop Cowper had been eight years in collecting materials for his Dictionary. One day, in his absence, his wife, who was afraid he would injure himself by his arduous studies, gathered up all the manuscript notes he had been so long collecting, and in the kindness of her heart committed them to the flames. It was all done to save the good man's life. When he returned, she told him what sho had done. Satisfied of the kind motive which prompted her to do it, he cooly replied in these brief words, "Woman! thou hast put me to eight years' study more." The reply was more dignified and christian, and accomplished more than a storm of anger.

A few kind words and oily sentences are not sufficient to atone for a general habit of fretfulness. The rose parts with its lovely hues, and the daisy droops upon the hill-side, if only one sunny day in seven pours genial rays upon it, and the rest is driving storm. There is need of continual kindness in this blest and delicato relation, to welcome peace.

And to this end mutual yielding is needful. For "in love's wars, he who fleeth is conqueror."

MUTUAL ATTENTION is yet another duty of the conjugal relation. It has been said, that, "a woman can bear any thing better than a slight." As much may be said of man. Neglect, on either side, may awaken suspicion and jealousy. Both, however, should be careful not to construe every instance of apparent indifference into intentional neglect. The husband has more connection with the world—its numerous carcs and anxietics its failures and sad reverses. The same flow of cheerfulness will not always speak in his eye, and throb in his heart. His mind is sometimes intensely absorbed in his wordly affairs, and often jaded and tired by disappointments, so that he may not always return at evening to his family with his wonted joy and cheerfulness. He may omit an accustomed word of greeting. He may be unsocial and silent. And yet this may not be neglect. This the wife should have good sense enough to see and understand. There is a time to talk and a time to be silent — a time to laugh and a time to reflect a time to be merry and a time to be sober. On the other hand, the silence or sadness of a wife, her want of interest and attention, should not always be construed into designed neglect by her husband. Abundant reasons for this may exist, and these should first be sought.

There are many practices in married life inconsistent with this mutual attention. One only will be named. The husband often spends his evenings unnecessarily away from home, at the tavern or shops. It is not a very flattering compliment to the social character of his wife. If he prefers the company of his joking neighbors, in tavern or store, to that of his chosen wife at home, there is something wrong in his views and feelings respecting the conjugal relation. Were he compelled to sit solitary and alone, through the lengthy evenings of winter, while his wife is "muking merry"

at the neighbors, methinks he would be heartily sick of home, if not of her. "It is a poor rule that won't work both ways." This leads me to remark in close connection with the above:

A JUST APPRECIATION OF EACH OTHER'S TRIALS is involved in the duties of married life. While it is frequently true that a wife supposes her husband has no trials, it is very generally the case that the husband knows his wife has comparatively few. Here, then, let us tarry for a moment and consider.

The husband has cares both at home and abroad; the wife only at home. He has domestic duties to perform, and the still more pressing ones of his business to discharge. He must provide for his table-furnish his family with necessary clothing-secure and bargain with domesticsfurnish fuel to warm his habitation — oversee the culture of his garden and attend to other "et cetera ;" while his regular business demands his attention, at the same time, abroad. He has laborers to obtain and counsel - materials to purchase and distribute-markets to watch and visitplans to devise and study-goods to sell-collections to be made accounts to be settled-disappointments to be met—and numberless cares and responsibilities of his avocation to bear.

The wife sits queen of the domestic circle, but not without her trials. Every day brings them to her lot. They are new every morning, and fresh every evening. Let us count her trials in a single day. Breakfast at an carly hour to accommodate her husband about his business-Hattie and Willie to wash and dress-Ann, the fretful Irish girl in the kitchen, to flatter and direct- to officiate at the table, pour coffee, and wait upon the clamoring children, all at once by this time, the babe is awake and screaming in th cradle-he must be washed, and clothed, and fed, while other duties are suspended—the other children to be pre

pared for school, faces washed, clothes adjusted, hair combed now breakfast finished, cold potatoes, cold meat, cold bread-table to be cleared, dishes washed, rooms swept and dusted-baby crying lustily for sleep-nursing, rocking, singing-door-bell ringing-morning calls — mortification and apologies-child as cep, callers gone, hair is to adjust and morning dress to change-all hurry for dinner -in burst the children from school, screaming and crying -Hattic has torn her apron, and Willie has tumbled down and cut his face-bedlam reigns for a minute - kisses, kind words, and peppermints, by a kind of miracle, produce quict, just as the husband comes to dine-all is peace and happiness, so that he begins to think his home is as free from trial as Paradise- the same scene over and over, and worse too-Willie is coming down with the measles- the other children must have them too-and then the mumps, whoopping cough, and chicken pox - what sleepless nights and anxious days-watching, dozing, sweating, worn, weary, sad-poor woman's unequal share-the husband away about his business.

Be not regardless of a woman's trials, O, man! Appreciate a man's trials, O, woman!

MUTUAL INDUSTRY, or devotion to the interests of cach party's sphere, belongs to the conjugal relation. This is a strong link in the golden chain of matrimonial bliss. Appollo could convert a tortoise shell into a charming harp because he was up with the breaking morn. But NARCISsus, “idly gazing at his own features reflected in the placid mirror of a fountain, until fatally and foolishly enamored of his own inspired charms, perished there, an image of indolence and vanity."

An industrious woman wedded to a lazy man, or vice versa, is sure to be an unhappy alliance. Indolence or idleness, on the part of either or of both, breeds a host of ills to mar the harmony of connubial intercourse. The Turkish

« AnteriorContinuar »