ADVERTISEMENT. Being well acquainted with the propensity of the society, in which these my labours will be circulated, to puns, and more particularly stale puns, I have taken the liberty of adopting the Advertisement of MR. FITZ-ADAM on a similar occasion, viz.-That all such witticisms as This is a bad worldthis world is full of vanities—I am weary of this world--sick of this world, -would that this world would come to an end, &c. &c.'-shall be voted by all that hear them to be without any wit, humour, or pleasantry whatsoever, and be treated accordingly. N. B. The passage from Hamlet "How weary, stale, flat, and unprofitable, "Seem to me all the uses of this world." having been already quoted over and over again on this subject, must be included in the above protest. Q. No. II. TUESDAY, DECEMBER 5, 1815, Venator defessa toro cum membra reponit CLAUD. AN evening or two ago, being very tired and sleepy, I was just going to bed, when I recollected to my great chagrin, that I had an imposition to do by the next morning. Half asleep and half awake, I sat down to my disagreable task, which happened to be to transcribe that part of the Sixth Book of Virgil, where Anchises shews Æneas his descendants, and expounds the parts they are destined to act in the great drama of the Roman history. After I had finished, I began to ruminate on what I had been transcribing, and confusedly to compare it with the conver sation between our first parents and the angel Michael in Paradise Lost, and the Student and the Devil on Two Sticks in Le Sage, till at last I fell asleep in my chair. What I had been thinking of just before, naturally gave a turn to my dreams. I thought I saw Queen Elizabeth in her costume and appearance exactly like the picture of her over the door in the head master's dining-room. On a sudden I imagined we were both standing near the quarter bell, whence we overlooked the school; which, like the houses in Le Diable Boiteux, was without its roof, so that we could see all the boys at once in their several forms at their lessons. The queen bade me look at them, and gave me to understand that she would tell me the future history of any of my school-fellows I pleased. The first whose fate I enquired after, was a boy who has the character of being a very great dunce, but at the same time a very great Muzz.-To my astonishment, my royal companion informed me, that he would become the most luminous Lawyer of his day. I next required to know the destiny of a friend of mine, who had got head into College, and is universally reckoned a very great genius. This question I thought would give the queen pleasure to answer, for I expected to hear that he would add another name to the list of her illustrious scholars; but how much was I disappointed when I heard, that he will first become an unsuccessful candidate for theatrical fame, then a paragraph writer, and finally a Debate-reporter to a Newspaper. I was astonished to find that the characters of those, whose destinies the queen unfolded to me, are, (according to her account) to be widely different hereafter from what they promise at present. A boy who is now kicked about as a coward and a fool, is to receive the thanks of both houses of parliament for his distinguished conduct in a great military engagement; while another who has fought more battles than any one else in the school, is to be broken by a Court-Martial for absolute cowardice in the field of battle. But what surprised me more than any thing was, that a boy who makes it his boast to set all the rules of the school at defiance, who is the promoter of every mischievous scheme, and the leader of every unprincipled expedition, who cuts jokes on Religion and Morality, is destined to be hereafter a celebrated Methodist Preacher. After many other enquiries, the result of which generally astonished or disappointed me," May it please your gracious Majesty," said I, "to condescend to inform me how the fates intend to dis pose of me." "Oh!" said her Majesty, smiling, "Heu! miserande puer ! si qua fata aspera 66 rumpas, "Tu |